“I can’t believe Nick and I are actually getting married!” Willow squealed.
Kennedy listened to her roommate through a thick fog of jet lag-induced exhaustion. Driving five hours in the dark wasn’t how she’d planned to spend her first night of Christmas vacation in Alaska. She took a sip of what had once been hot cocoa and was now a grainier version of chocolate milk.
“I’m really excited for you.” Kennedy hoped her voice held the right amount of enthusiasm. If she thought Willow and Nick’s engagement came suddenly, it was nothing compared to how fast they’d set the date.
The day after tomorrow, just a few days before Christmas, Willow and Nick would exchange their vows in the little country church near Willow’s childhood home in Copper Lake, a small homestead community about forty-five minutes beyond Glennallen and the edge of the Glenn Highway.
Willow drummed her mittens on the steering wheel to keep time with her classic rock music. “I’m so glad you’re here. I couldn’t ask for a better maid of honor.”
Kennedy had never been in a wedding before and could only guess what she was expected to do. Her roommate assured her the ceremony would be a casual event and she had nothing to worry about, but Willow obviously didn’t understand the way Kennedy’s brain worked.
There was always something to worry about.
Like the way her friend Ian had asked her out on several breakfast dates before his business trip to Asia and hadn’t called or emailed or texted her since.
Or like the way she’d been fired from her TA job last semester because she refused to take back what she’d written for a column in the school paper. The details regarding how she’d been treated after publishing her piece in the Harvard Forum had made little waves in pro First Amendment blogs and news outlets, but the publicity was finally starting to die down, thank God.
“Oh!” Willow exclaimed. “I almost forgot. You were going to answer some of those questions I had about Revelations, remember?”
Kennedy remembered, but she was exhausted after three different flights and two drawn-out layovers, not to mention all the strange events that had happened since she landed in Alaska. There was no way she could muster up the energy it’d take to field all of Willow’s questions about the end times. She should be asleep in a nice Anchorage hotel right now like she’d originally planned, not making the five-hour drive to Copper Lake this late at night.
Willow turned her music down. “All right. First question is about the rapture. I basically know what it means, at least I think I do. It’s when Jesus comes back and takes all the believers up to heaven, right?”
Kennedy was pining away for a soft pillow and layer upon layer of blankets. Even with the heat running in Willow’s car, she hadn’t been able to shake her chill since arriving in Alaska. The outside temperature had dropped below negative twenty once they approached the mountain pass on the Glenn Highway. Kennedy had decided that all the handmade quilts Willow’s family owned still wouldn’t be enough to warm her entirely.
Or help her forget her fears from that night.
“… why some people argue that the rapture’s got to happen first but others say it won’t come until later, and when I went to study it for myself, the word rapture wasn’t even in the New Testament, so that’s my first question.”
Kennedy tried to figure out what she’d missed. The rapture? She didn’t know how to respond. She’d read through Revelation once or maybe twice before, but she always stepped into it assuming it would be too hard to grasp, a prediction that turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy. She liked the last couple chapters that talked about having no more death or crying or pain in heaven, and she figured that the letters to the churches at the beginning of the book had some good advice for believers today, but all the stuff in the middle was so wrapped up in convoluted symbolism that she never bothered trying to make sense out of it.
If experts who’d been studying theology for hundreds of years couldn’t agree, how could Kennedy presume to understand? Jesus would come back, and all believers would end up in heaven. The rest of the details were best left for pastors and seminary professors to discuss and debate.
Still, she owed Willow some sort of response, but unfortunately her brain had already shut down for the night. Her roommate had been growing so fast in her faith, Kennedy was scrambling to catch up.
“And then there’s the tribulation,” Willow went on. Maybe if she talked long enough, she would eventually land on a question Kennedy felt qualified to answer. “I read one commentator who said the tribulation’s just this sort of symbolic idea that Christians are going to suffer before Jesus returns, but then Pastor Carl was talking in his sermon about how it’s this literal seven-year period, and either way you look at it is pretty depressing.”
Kennedy muttered some sort of response about how that was a good point and wondered what else she could contribute to the conversation.
Willow moved on to the millennium, but Kennedy was only half listening. After everything she’d experienced in Anchorage that night, it was understandable for her to feel more than a little edgy. The sun had already set by the time her plane touched down that afternoon, and now it was even darker. No street lamps, no light pollution because they were on that stretch of the Glenn Highway where you could travel fifty or sixty miles between towns.
She shouldn’t be worried about the dark. That was just her anxiety kicking in. She’d picked the second shortest day of the year to land in Alaska, and the entire state felt on the verge of panic. Of course, the increasingly vocal number of wackos claiming that the winter solstice would mark the beginning of some sort of Armageddon-like end-of-days scenario did nothing to settle her nerves, not to mention the recent events that seemed to verify their predictions.
She wouldn’t think about that. If she knew anything about what the Bible said, it was that nobody could guess the time or the day of Christ’s return. Everyone claiming something contrary was making stuff up, even the ones who seemed to forecast with uncanny accuracy the meteorological events that had been popping up worldwide.
An F-4 tornado in the Midwest in December. An unseasonably late typhoon hitting the Philippines that same week, and that was on top of everything going on in Alaska.
Her dad had warned her, hadn’t he? Said that even if the geological predictions weren’t accurate, the civil unrest that could ensue from such wild claims would make the state volatile. Dangerous.
He hadn’t told her not to go. She was too old to be ordered around like that, and he knew how much it meant to her to be the maid of honor at her roommate’s wedding. But he’d asked her several times to reconsider.
When she came here with Willow in the past, Alaska felt so quiet, so safe. Should she have listened to her dad? Well, it was too late now. All the planes were grounded, so it’s not like she could change her mind even if she wanted to.
At least Copper Lake was far enough removed from the chaos. Hopefully.
No, she shouldn’t think like that. She had to be more positive.
“So I’m leaning towards what Sproul says when it comes to the millennium, but I’m still planning to read up a little more on it. What do you think?”
Kennedy frantically tried to replay the last few lines of conversation.
“You weren’t listening were you?” Willow accused.
“I was listening,” Kennedy protested. “I heard what you were saying, I just didn’t …” She tried to find the right words.
“Didn’t pay attention?” Willow let out a good-natured chuckle.
Kennedy stared at her lap. “Sorry.”
“It’s ok. It’s been a wicked long day for you, hasn’t it?”
“That’s one way of putting it.” Kennedy had been looking forward to spending Christmas break in Alaska, not just because she was excited to share in all the wedding plans but because Copper Lake was so peaceful. Maybe spending a week or two with the Winters each year was the cure for her anxiety that she’d been hunting for. But now, after everything that had happened in one short evening …
“Well, we can discuss Revelations later, all right?” Willow turned off her classic rock music. “Let’s talk about something else. Like what did you think of the movie? At least the parts we got to see.”
Kennedy didn’t want to admit she’d been too tired to pay attention when they were at the theater earlier. The end-times flick Willow had dragged her to was horribly canned. “It was all right.”
Willow turned the music off. “Do you think it really could happen like that, with them rounding up the Christians and taking away all the Bibles?”
At least this was a question Kennedy felt somewhat qualified to answer after the ten years she spent with her parents in China. “It’s like that already in some parts of the world. I told you the story about that Bible smuggler from North Korea, right?”
“Yeah. So I guess we just need to be prepared to die for our faith one day?”
The question surprised Kennedy. “I suppose so. At least theoretically.”
“And what about people like that mother in the movie, the one who pretended to go along with them and got that chip in her hand and said she didn’t believe in Jesus? It wasn’t like she meant it. She just told them that so they wouldn’t take her baby away from her. God wouldn’t send her to hell over something like that, right?”
Now they had officially crossed into territory in which Kennedy was too tired and too inexperienced to offer any kind of reasonable answer. “I really don’t think it’s a question of heaven or hell. It’s just doing what God thinks you should do and knowing that despite everything he’s watching you and he’ll be with you.”
Apparently, Willow wasn’t satisfied with Kennedy’s rambling response. “Ok, let me put it another way. Let’s say that she stood up for her beliefs, that she didn’t let them put in that chip and she didn’t deny Christ, so then she gets thrown in jail and her daughter gets handed over to the atheist family. What then? Does God promise that at some point he’ll make sure the little girl will grow up and learn the truth? Because otherwise, if you’re asking a mother to either lie about her own faith or surrender her kid to hell ...”
Kennedy was glad Willow’s voice trailed off. Glad there wasn’t an actual question she was expected to answer. As a result of her parents’ work with underground Christians, Kennedy had heard harrowing stories of the suffering believers endured, but she did her best to compartmentalize them as things that happened on the other side of the world to people who looked and spoke and lived entirely differently than she did.
“Anyway,” Willow added, “I thought the policeman was wicked hot. And I’ve seen him in something else, but I can’t remember what. Maybe that hospital drama on HBO? Was he on there?”
Kennedy was relieved at the conversational turn. While Willow rambled on about different TV shows, Kennedy could stare out the window at the blinding darkness without having to think.
“... she’s the one in that super cute detective series. You know which one I mean?”
Kennedy snapped her head around. “Huh?”
Willow sighed. “How about you pick something to talk about? I’m out of ideas.”
Kennedy’s hands grew sweaty even though her core was chilled. What should she say? That after everything that had happened since she arrived in Alaska, it was taking every bit of her mental energy to keep from panicking? That she was starting to wonder if she should have listened to her dad even if it meant missing out on Willow’s big day. That knowing all the flights in and out of Anchorage were grounded made her feel claustrophobic in spite of how large this state was, and driving in the pitch dark in the snow in sub-zero temperatures was one of the creepiest things she’d done all year.
No, she couldn’t focus on her fear. Even if she was stuck here in Alaska, even if the dire predictions made by these end-of-the-worlders with their picket signs came true, it’s not like she could turn around now, hop on a plane, and fly back East. There was nothing to do but make the best of her situation and focus on positive things.
Like Willow getting ready to marry the love of her life.
“How are things going back home?” she asked. “What do your parents think of Nick?”
“Oh, they love him to pieces.” Willow ran her fingers through her hair, which she’d reverted back to its natural color for the wedding. Up until now Kennedy thought it was those outrageous dye jobs that made Willow stand out in a crowd, but now she realized her roommate would look stunning no matter what she did with her hair. “You should have heard Nick and my dad last night. They were talking about everything that’s been happening, then got onto global warming and carbon footprints and climate change. I swear if I weren’t going to marry him, my dad would do it for me.”
“Do they have any problems with him being a Christian?”
Willow shook her feathery head of hair. “Not at all. My mom thinks those goofy shirts of his are adorable, and he and my parents are always having really deep discussions about faith and politics — you know, all those things that Nick hates talking about,” she added with a sarcastic grin.
Kennedy hoped her chuckle sounded convincing. “Well, I’m glad he’s fitting in so well.”
“Me too. I think my only real complaint is that my parents don’t see the difference between me being a Christian and me falling in love with Nick. The way they look at it, they assume I converted because of him.”
“But you got saved before you and Nick met.”
Willow shrugged. “Yeah, I know, but in their minds it’s all one big life event. But it’s not that bad. They’re really happy for me. They know I’ve been taking my faith seriously, and I think it’s been good for them to meet Nick, who’s so different from the typical Christian you see in sitcoms or read about in the news, you know?” She laughed. “I’m just glad that they’re so comfortable with him. I swear they act like he’s their long-lost son or something.”
“What about Nick’s family?” Kennedy asked. “Are many of them coming up for the wedding? Did anybody get stuck before they could fly in?”
“No, it’s so cold up here we didn’t want to make everyone fly out. We’ll head to Washington right after Christmas, assuming the planes are up and running by then.”
Kennedy calmed the quivering in her core. Tried to forget everything that had happened to spook her once she’d arrived in Alaska. Did her best to convince herself that Copper Lake was far enough from Anchorage that she’d be perfectly fine. By the time she was ready to fly back East to spend Christmas with her pastor’s family, everything would be back to normal again.
She hoped.
“What about you?” Willow asked.
“Me what?”
“I don’t know. Tell me about your finals or about your premed stuff or about Mr. Redhead who’s taken you out to breakfast like five times this semester. I’ve been doing nothing but listen to Nick and my dad talk politics for the past week. I need some kind of distraction.”
Kennedy tried to think of something interesting to tell her roommate that she didn’t already know. She had spent most of the past semester wondering about her relationship with Ian and stressing out about med school. Her provisional acceptance to Harvard’s program had been revoked after she wrote a newspaper article that turned out to be far more controversial than she’d expected. It had taken both her dad and her reporter friend Ian several different phone calls to several different news outlets to convince the university to change their minds. Thanks to their concerted effort, she had a guaranteed spot in Harvard Med School once she graduated, but did she want to go anymore? Why should she come crawling back to the administration that slammed their doors in her face for doing nothing but stating her opinion?
The question had reverberated in the back of her head all semester. Unfortunately, it was a decision she couldn’t postpone indefinitely. By summer at the latest, she’d have to decide. It wasn’t like her to be without a solid, definitive course of action. As much as she trusted God’s guidance, she needed a plan, a plan that preferably laid out the next five to ten years in a neat, tidy package.
As for Ian ...
“You can start that conversation any time, you know.”
Kennedy snapped back to the present. “What were we talking about?”
“That’s what you were supposed to decide, remember?”
“Oh, yeah. Umm …” Kennedy stared at the snowflakes illuminated in Willow’s headlights. “Let’s see … Is everything ready for the big day?”
Willow laughed. “I’m going to be so sick of planning weddings when this is all over. I can guarantee you that. Sandy called me a few nights ago to see how things were coming along. It was really sweet of her. I joked and told her if I’d known how stressful it was to plan even a simple wedding like ours, Nick and I would have eloped months ago. But she reminded me how special it is to be engaged, and something about that gave me more perspective, I guess. I mean, every single day that we have to keep ourselves pure is a new adventure in self-control, but here we are, and in two days we’ll be husband and wife, so it’s not like waiting was the end of the world.
“Oh, speaking of the end of the world, that was another question I wanted to ask you. The mark of the beast. Is the number 666 some really crazy dangerous thing like some people say? I mean, I saw it mentioned there in Revelations and they talked about it a lot in that movie, but I wasn’t sure if it was the number itself that was so evil or if it’s more symbolic or whatnot.”
Kennedy wished she could transport herself through time and space and end up at the Winters’ homestead in Copper Lake, hopefully beneath ten or twelve quilts. “I don’t know.”
Willow glanced over at her, clearly expecting more.
“I don’t know,” she repeated. “I seriously have no idea.”
Willow frowned and finally shrugged. “Fair enough.” She sighed. “I kind of want to call Nick and see how he’s doing, but we won’t have cell coverage for quite a while.” She pointed at the time. “Hey, look. We made it to midnight.” She cracked a huge grin. “Happy solstice.”
Kennedy wasn’t sure if the greeting was an Alaskan tradition or something her roommate came up with. “You too,” she replied tentatively.
Willow let out a carefree laugh. “Looks like the end-of-the-worlders were wrong again. I’m still here. Are you?”
“Yeah.” Kennedy tried to sound amused, but she was still thinking about how worried her dad had been about her traveling to Alaska in the first place.
Willow started to hum under her breath, and Kennedy chuckled when she recognized the tune.
“Don’t tease me,” Willow protested. “Can’t I be excited without you making fun of me?”
Kennedy giggled. It felt nice to stop focusing on Alaskan crises and apocalyptic predictions and bizarre meteorological phenomena. Willow was getting married in two days, and Kennedy was going to toss aside her worries long enough to give her roommate the celebration she deserved.
Willow increased her volume, and Kennedy started singing with her.
Because we’re going to the chapel …
Before long, they were both belting as loudly as they could, making up in enthusiasm what they lacked in musical ability.
And we’re gonna get married.
Their singing was terrible, but the stress of the day coupled with her exhaustion made it seem that much funnier. Kennedy couldn’t hold in her laugh.
That’s when she heard Willow scream.
Saw the massive animal directly in front of them.
Felt the seatbelt yank against her chest as the car plowed into a moose.
